2013 in Retrospect - Mr Alabama

Mr Alabama... Who was he? He was a boy I met online in the times of yahoo messenger, when social media was just starting. We were pen pals. We even spoke on the phone several times. Funnily enough, I remember my mum bringing up a conversation about how she had all these phone bills to calls in Alabama and she assumed it was my dad doing stuff on the Internet and not really knowing what he was doing. I still haven't told her it was me. Guess I'll have to tell her. So Mr Alabama was now a man with 2 kids of his own. We got chatting on Facebook and he was a little drunk. But then again I was too and he was a great distraction for the day so we carried on chatting. In the midst of all the chatting, my sister messages me asking if I wanted to go and play tennis. i'd like to add that I am not good at tennis at all. Hey, I had no plans, why not. This should be interesting after 3 glasses of white. So off we went to have a game completely distracted because I was still conversing with Mr Alabama at the same time. And he, i guess i'll just say, was horny! He wanted to Skype after my game. I don't generally Skype. I hate seeing myself on camera. It could be just lack of self confidence but anyway I agreed. So I shower, put on some makeup and get myself ready for this chat. I have no idea what the etiquette of Skype chatting is. Do you put on make up just for that? Who knows. So he calls, I'm so nervous. The first 10 minutes was incredibly awkward. After talking about how awesome it was to talk after all these years, Mr Alabama pulls out his wanger! And like a school girl, I start giggling. What the hell is supposed to happen now? I don't remember saying much, just a lot of watching. And there right in front of me, Mr Alabama pleasured himself. Was it a rush? Was it completely inappropriate? Probably. It was exciting and definitely something to remember. We carried on chatting for a couple of hours after that, he sang a few songs and I have to admit, he's actually pretty good. Then we exchanged cellphone numbers and said our good nights. That night, I went to bed completely relaxed and happy without a thought of what my husbands infidelities. For the next couple of weeks after that we chatted a lot. I knew I wasn't over anything from my marriage. I still had a lot of stuff to work on but he was a great distraction and I knew that this could all come crashing down. And it did! I treated this like we were together, like we were exclusive. I wasn't ready to trust and that definitely came through. I can't remember exact details but my insecurities came through and I started widely accusing of so many things. We stopped messaging and I had time to calm down and think things through. He was right. I was incredibly insecure, I couldn't trust and I have issues. Well that was pretty obvious! So I did what I had left, I wrote to him a long winded letter apologizing for my actions, my feelings and realistically the trauma that I went through. I'll never really know if he read it completely but I felt better putting it in writing. He messaged me a day later. In the weeks after that we would message each other. I'd try my best to separate my feelings of betrayal from one man and talk about my feelings with this man. Again, I knew this would turn out horribly wrong. But this was a time of trial and error. Then there was a time when our messages weren't synchronizing and he would receive messages out of sync and reply. I would receive weird replies that didn't make sense and in frustration it turned in to a ridiculous fight over nothing. Just bad mobile networks.